An hour....

An entire hour. Of the fire alarm right beside my desk going off every 5 minutes. And when the alarm isn't screaming, the light on it is still flashing, so that if there were a fire, we could have a party complete with strobe lights. Honestly, people, what good would the flashing light do? If there's a fire, there's already going to be plenty of flickering light by which to see our certain fiery doom approach. And if we are to die by smoke inhalation, will a flashing light really help us see better than a constant light through thick clouds of noxious fumes that choke and burn? Or will it just trigger seizures in some, and migraines in others?

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Pause.

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Pause.

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Pause.

(Almost as an afterthought) Beep!

Wait 5 minutes. Repeat. Welcome to my hell.

One last fire related ridiculous observation: there are three bright green exit signs in my office. One of them hangs above the door that leads to the stairs, the quickest way out. A second hangs above an emergencey exit that leads, not to an exit, but to a confusing mass of more offices and cubicles. A maze before you reach the actual exit. The third hangs above a door to a single room that has no exit. No door but the one you entered through. No windows. Just your personal corner of hell in which to burn. Enjoy.