Inevitable disappointment.

Look here, people. We need to talk. In particular we need to talk about World of Warcraft. More precisely, we need to talk about gender.

Let's say you decide to play WoW. Say your girlfriend got you a subscription as your anniversary present. You log in, enroll, and love the game. Now say you make an alt that's, oh, I don't know, a human female warrior. Are you a) exercising your right to roleplay, b) enjoying the character creation capabilities that your account lets you exercise, c) harmlessly role-playing, or d) unwittingly inviting every creep with thumbs to hit on your fake person?

Big surprise, it's d.

To set the record straight, internet: I'm a dude. I've checked. Doctors have checked (my god, they've checked, and let's not have any more of that checking, ok?). The innocent Belgians across the road in Rome have accidentally checked. They all agree. I don't "have a nice rack," I'm not "a sweet piece," nor would I appreciate your illiterate attempts at bringing off "cybr plz????!?1??"

Recap: 1) No boobs. 2) I don't want you staring at them even if they aren't real. 3) Totally a dude.

Thanks for your time. Go back to your, your Etch-a-Sketch, and your Tinker Toys, and, and your Moby Grape, you horny bastards.